Retirement, Not On Your Life!

Retirement is wonderful. Lots of people say that they are bored stiff, but I wonder how they can even begin to be bored. Routine, that's what they miss in their lives. They can't give up the work attitude and get into a constant vacation mode. I have had no trouble so far. Retirees say they will miss their friends. I ask which ones? The friends at work; the social friends; the friends as church; which ones?

I retired more than one year ago. I know that seems like not a long time to be able to comment on retirement as a whole, but as of right now, retirement is my life, and I accept that. I have tried to get a job, even interviewed for one yesterday. But so far, according to interviewers, I have too much experience; would not be comfortable in their setting; and, I have been the boss too long!

Where they get this notion of me being the boss is beyond me. I was only a head coach for six years, and then I was more of an organizer and motivator. My teams were good enough that they could win without me getting in the way. At home, my wife lets me think I am in charge, but she signs all the checks. I did not even get to see my paycheck for 30 years, she signed it and deposited it. The school secretary put my check stub in with hers and sent it to her school! The one time she did let me sign it, the bank called to be sure that someone else besides Dorothy had not gotten my check and then signed it! Imagine, calling to be sure someone did not give me money and sign my name to it...

I am a warm, giving, loyal employee. Ask my wife. I arrive early, I stay late and I rarely ask for a day off. I am conscientious and honest. I love to get my hands dirty and I am not afraid to take the blame when things go wrong, and I stand in the background when they go right. Matter of fact, I have used the primary pronoun more in this article than I have in all the years teaching and coaching.

But I digress...

If retirees need to feel that old sense of routine. They need to develop one.

(1) Get up
(2) Morning constitutional
(3) Breakfast and paper reading in reading room.
(4) Catch up on TV shows from previous night.
(5) Lunch
(6) Pool time and nap
(7) Go to WalMart to look for bargains and flirt with checkout girls.
(8) Clean pool and yard.
(9) Fix delicious high fiber dinner
(10) Watch Cubs game.
(11) Nap 3-7 innings.
(12) Shower and go to bed.

Occasionally, there can be a substitution at (7) for a round of golf, but really, if one pays attention to each item and utilizes about one hour per item, there is ample time for interaction with other adults, private time, and the occasional trip to the Sizzler or Hometown Buffet around 4 pm.

Retirement... the next best thing to being there.

Doughnut